Mental Health Awareness

So...this afternoon and evening as I've been struggling over tomorrow's portrait I decided to paint a second self-portrait rather than painting over the first. There are often times in this creative process when I need to step away from a work-in-progress because I stop 'seeing'...it's those nuances I overlook. I begin to paint what I think should be there instead of paying close attention to shapes and contrast like I know that I should.

So far there have been portraits that have been absolutely effortless and others that I have laboured over. I wonder if I put too much pressure on myself to paint what I think someone would like to see instead of what I see in them. 

Also, I find myself in my head too much, worrying about...well, what don't I worry about? And, yet, when I let go and just enjoy the process instead of worrying about the outcome, it's lovely. On this mental health awareness day all I can say is that I am so grateful for this creative life. With a family history of mental illness, alcoholism and suicide I know that the time I take to do what I love saves me. And I am also beyond grateful for all of these strong, beautiful, empowering #nastywomen in my life. ❤ — with The100DayProject.